Recently I received an email that actually made me laugh out loud. In honor of the fact that it doesn't seem to happen very often I am going to post the ones I deem most humorous.
* Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions,switch to Espresso. (I wonder what would happen to my supervisors?)
* When The Money Comes Out Of The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"
* When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
* As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
* Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
* Walk around "A Superstore" and randomly place boxes of Tampons or Condoms in other people's carts.
Another direction now...
Well tomorrow is our last class "to jump start the process" of saving our marriage. I assume we will be asked to make some sort of decision as to "actively fixing" or start the divorce process. The problem appears to be that we are at a stalemate... I'm stuck on the whole BEING FAITHFUL and not building relationships (or sleeping with!) other women. He's stuck on me cleaning the house every waking moment I'm not at work. The issue with that is that he has been remodeling the house for the last 5 years...without much progress to say the least. It is difficult to clean around the tools and half finished projects IN EVERY ROOM! Well his newest theory is that I need to help him finish all these projects which in Big Red language translates into "finish the house by yourself!" The simple fact is that I don't know how to drywall, replace windows, hang cabinets or lay carpet. I'm not exactly... oh shall we say...."handy" with home projects like that.
I have been seeking God's wisdom on this entire issue and He took me to a few interesting places in the Bible today. He started out in Eze. with the story of the Dry Bones in the Valley, then to Psalms and praising Him and finally to Jer. 8. This caught my attention because it discusses a people who have walked away from God (don't seek Him) and He takes things away from them, homes, fields and THE MAN"S WIFE because of his unfaithfulness to God! This fits right in with the feeling that I have that God has released me from this marriage.
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