I couldn't help myself

ANTI-TALKSIDENT

A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators.



DAMNITOL
Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours.

JACKASSPIRIN

Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary, phone number, or to lift the toilet seat.



MENICILLIN
Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethal lines as, "You make me want to be a better person.




NAGAMENT
When administered to a boyfriend or husband, provides the same irritation level as nagging him.